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Oh, I cottoned onto you immediately. Yes, being able to tie puns together in a single post will be viewed favorably. But be warned, because this is such a open and gaping - well, you know - I will punish weak puns severely for the first 20 posts or so. I've watched House, ya know.....

A pun (or paronomasia) is a phrase that deliberately exploits confusion between similar-sounding words for humorous or rhetorical effect.

A pun may also cause confusion between two senses of the same written or spoken word, due to homophony, homography, homonymy, polysemy, or metaphorical usage. Walter Redfern has said: "To pun is to treat homonyms as synonyms"^[1]. For example, in the phrase, "There is nothing punny about bad puns", the pun takes place in the deliberate confusion of the implied word "funny" by the substitution of the word "punny", a heterophone of "funny". By definition, puns must be deliberate; an involuntary substitution of similar words is called a malapropism.

I hope to explain my scoring in such a way as to give the combatants an idea of how to "impress" me:

#1 BoardFlak - 2.0

Nice start with the the right sort of introductory theme. The puns were a bit predictable, however, but "suture style" (suit your style) was very good. Nice tying together of the puns within a theme, too.

#2 Ducky - 1.75

This one was a bit all over the place. "Impatient" and "semicolons" were great. However, the rest of the post contained no real puns, but rather word play and cryptograms alluding to puns, which, whilst clever, aren't puns in themselves. Over all, though, a typical Duckster wit-fest.

#3 BoardFlak 3.0

This effort was, to me, just about purrfect, though "mewt" was a bit weaker than the rest. Short, sharp, well tied together and clever plus funny (aspirin was great). This is the sort of post that will earn full points from me.

#4 Ducky 1.5

The actual puns all seem to be in the first paragraph. Again, very clever post all round and nicely themed but lacking in identifiable stand alone puns, thus reducing its score.

#5 BoardFlak 1.75

Way too much filler in this for me to score well. Nice narrative and a couple of strong puns, but the filler and complex narrative make finding and appreciating the punmanship too much of a chore. And more than one reference to erectile dysfunction in a single post is plain malicious

Scores so far:

BoardFlak: 6.75
Ducky: 3.25 (with a post to make up)

[I'm posting scores now rather than wait for Ducky to even up the number so as to alert combatants to certain aspects of their posting]